


Store Bought Gestures

by potatoes_tomatoes



Category: Ed Edd n Eddy
Genre: Character Study, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Gen, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I was high on cornerstore coffee @ 3am during a long road trip so apologies in advance, Introspection, Literally this is just "Double Dee evaluates his relationships: the Oneshot", M/M, Mutual Pining, Repressed Feelings, the unawareness in this bitch is astonishing., valentines day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-14 04:41:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29165106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/potatoes_tomatoes/pseuds/potatoes_tomatoes
Summary: On the eve of Valentine's Day, Edd sits down to overthink which cards are appropriate for his friends and peers, ending up mulling over his relationships in the process. His conclusions are....not what he expected. (takes place before the valentines day special in the show)
Relationships: Ed & Edd "Double D" & Eddy, Edd "Double D" & Kevin, Edd "Double D"/Eddy, Edd "Double D"/Nazz, Edd "Double D"/Sarah, Edd & Jhonny, Edd & Rolf
Comments: 5
Kudos: 30





	Store Bought Gestures

**Author's Note:**

> So during a road trip I was like "I wonder if Edd completely overthought his valentines for everyone. Bc the ones we see in the Valentines Special are... oddly, appropriate for how he feels abt everyone. huh, I wonder what Dee meant when Eddy's card said "You Electrify Me"" and then it *dawned on me*.

Twenty-five valentines for five dollars and thirty-three cents. Each cost about four cents, give or take. Double Dee laid them all out atop his desk—which was always in pristine order—ready to be assigned their recipients. His chair whining, he made himself comfortable on his seat, swishing side to side absently on his toes. He reached over and turned on his lamp. He didn’t need it on, the sun was shining perfectly well in his room. It was a habit more than anything. He would scold himself for wasting energy later, he supposed. 

He started reading through the valentines, wondering which of the 25 would be suitable for the 7 people he knew. With no one to consult, he mumbled his options to himself.  
Oh, he understood for a boy his age, valentines are reserved for potential lovers. Perhaps it was a fondness for the tradition, but he still preferred the more polite and inclusive way of handing out valentines to all acquaintances and friends. Everyone in the cul de sac did so up until a year ago, why should this year be any different? Plus, in his opinion, it was a much more inconspicuous way to give a valentine to a crush. He could do without any called attention and subsequent rejection, thank you very much.  
He chose no order to start, just whoever came to mind first; oddly enough, Johnny appeared. Shrugging, Double dee began shuffling through the stack.

**“I think of you periodic-ally, Valentine!”**

He chuckled, bringing a hand to his mouth. Well, it certainly was within the realms of truth. Edd didn’t think much of Johnny, but when he came to mind he could perfectly recall his unkempt manner of presentation. He so envied the carefree spirit Johnny exuded, but it died just as quickly when he realized there was not an ounce of sanity on his person. Double Dee could do without Johnny’s attitude if it meant he’d have to sacrifice his intelligence. What about Johnny was Edd trying to compliment again? Well, cedarwood, fresh dirt, and a faint grassy stench seemed to be his permanent scent... that was... certainly appropriate. Edd wondered for a moment if he should assign a card to plank, then shook his head in disbelief that for a moment he regarded Johnny’s ominous friend as alive. Still, Edd wrote to Johnny and plank.... just in case. 

He placed the paper near the edge of the table. Perfectly perpendicular, he noted with a smile. Now only six more to go. He opted to grab a random valentine and feel who fit it best. 

  
**“You light me up, Valentine!”**

Rolf jumped into his mind. An agreeable and upright fellow, if not a bit confusing. He admired how concerned he was with honor and keeping the peace. Edd was certain they could be friends were it not for his (understandable) grudge against the eds when they all made themselves disrespectful housemates.   
Edd began signing the card when a thought caused him to pause. Would Rolf even know or understand the meaning of Valentine's cards? Would Edd even have the patience to explain once handing it over? Oh, Well, he already halfway wrote his name. It’d be a waste of paper to throw it away now.

**“Just Like Osteoarthritis, you make me weak In the knees!”**

Kevin came to mind. Bitterly, Double Dee recalled his sabotage of Eddy’s school photo last week. Forcing down the bile of anger in his throat, Edd realized he wasn’t the only one to harbor grudges. Perhaps when he was calmer, he’d write Kevin’s valentine. If he even cared to remember. 

Next.

  
**“I’ve got my ion you!”**

Freshly manicured nails, clothes never out of style, and an aura of innocence. An aura that was as much truth as it was a mask for an individual capable of committing atrocities out of vengeance, and sometimes worse: entertainment. Jimmy was a wild card, and Double Dee was never sure how much of Jimmy’s friendliness was sincere. It didn’t help that because of Sarah’s callous nature and Eddy’s mentoring, he was a prime contender for the cul de sac’s next scammer, should he ever desire to swindle others. Edd reluctantly concluded Jimmy would excel at it. How fortunate Jimmy was too caught up with fashion and personal upkeep to even bother with others. Still, being around Jimmy warranted caution: yes, this card was most appropriate for Jimmy. 

Edd supposed he should assign a card for Jimmy’s counterpart since she was already on his mind. Biting, sharp, she was fiercely controlling and motherly, and had a big mouth to boot— figuratively and literally. No one said it aloud out of fear, but it was true. It was odd to think a few months ago he openly displayed affection for Ed’s younger sister simply because he thought she was cute. What was odder was how nonchalant Ed was about it. Perhaps it was a testament to Ed’s unshakable trust in Edd. He admired her from afar, but the more he saw of Sarah—and the more he saw how awfully she treated his dear friend— his affections quickly dwindled into fear. How unfortunate that as soon as his affections faded, hers grew violently. 

**“You make my goggles fog up, Valentine!”**

Edd gave a sigh, hoping this one wouldn’t garner a spine crushing hug or spine crushing pounding. He couldn’t decide which would be worse. The only other female in the cul de sac was next. He so dreaded thinking of Nazz— oh, the flurry of emotions set loose every time her name graced his mind! Simply put, she was lovely. The sweetest, most kind, playful, and exuberant individual wrapped in one herbal scented package. 

Edd’s droopy smile began to dwindle as he came back to his senses.

  
Oh, was that all? 

Was that how he saw Nazz? An item, a token of adolescent attraction, someone as he once put it, “ _take-home-to-mother-ready_ ”? 

He shuffled the cards, finding that his brows became furrowed.

Nazz was an utter vexation, that much was true. He chalked it up to her beauty and the nervousness that aroused whenever she drew near. Yet he never considered approaching her, to either befriend or court, to rid of that nervousness once and for all. He was comfortable with the passing and going of surface-level excitement whenever she approached him. So, that’s what she was. Only an elusive symbol of his waning adolescence. He hadn’t anticipated coming to terms with how superficially he regarded her this afternoon. He hadn’t anticipated feeling so... frustrated at the conclusion either. 

The cards fell on the table more aggressively than he meant to. Edd began to twiddle the pen between his forefingers, finding interest in the fading text on its casing. The room was silent, save for the squeaking of Edd’s chair from his bouncing leg that fell deaf on his ears.

Content. He was content just letting his crush be simply that...a crush. 

It was expected of a boy his age, of a girl so sweet and much like an open book. Aside from the unapproachable Sarah, and the fearsome Kanker sisters, there wasn’t anyone else to pine over. Nearly every boy in the cul de sac felt the same way about Nazz. It was just so easy to follow along with it. A sudden, small voice inside told Double Dee that he must, as if any other alternative, if there was any, would mark him incorrigible. Wait, incorrigible? Why? 

He went back to the deck and pulled out the first card that revealed itself to him. A tan, cutely decorated Charles Darwin smiled, grey apes walking into the iconic evolutionary line of humans.

 **“Naturally, I select you!”**. 

  
It’s natural that he chose Nazz, he reasoned. He unclenched his jaw. He wrote his name and hers on the paper. Before setting it down with the other signed valentines, he paused for a beat. What he was expecting, he wasn’t sure. Perhaps he simply needed a moment of respite for his endlessly running brain. 

A door closed somewhere in the house. Edd jumped from his seat, clenching his shirt over where his heart was. The distant sound of keys and settling paper bags informed Edd that his mother came from work, and apparently the store. Edd let out a shaky breath. He wished he wasn’t so easily startled. 

Remembering his mother usually came home at 5:30, he brought out his wristwatch to confirm the time. Oh, that was an hour and a half down the drain! Time wasted on sorting out meddlesome emotions and reservations among his peers, for what? Valentines he knew wouldn’t be reciprocated? He was aware of how disliked he was by the rest of the cul de sac, and these plastic things weren’t worth the time to think hard about. And what good would mere store-bought cards do for his image? He pinched the bridge of his nose, attempting to soothe his oncoming headache. He should have not saved the most important people on his list for last. Inhale, exhale. 

  
Twenty cards left, only two of which would suit his best friends. 

Ed wasn’t hard to please, and he certainly wouldn’t think too hard on the card he received. Edd knew his friend would simply appreciate the gesture and keep it safe. All sorts of knickknacks and food were kept no matter the condition or occasion. Ed held the most minuscule of things in high regard; everything had something fun and wonderful to bring.   
Edd wished his dear friend would at least keep it clean if he could, for his sake. 

Double Dee had sifted through the cards long enough, he didn’t need to sort through them again.

**“You and I go off with a Big Bang!”**

Double Dee smiled. What an odd pair he and Ed were. Try as Edd might to appear clean, he always came home brandishing some sort of lint or stain from his friend. Even though they couldn’t understand each other from time to time (more often than not, if he was honest) it was each other’s sincere company that Edd cherished. Besides, who else would happily run face-first into whatever insane concoction double dee created, only to emerge from the fallout with an infectious, dopey smile? 

Edd shook his head in amusement as he finished signing Ed’s card. He wondered if his friend would also give out cards to everyone tomorrow. 

  
Last, but certainly not the least, was Eddy.

  
Double Dee knew each card by heart. Still, he felt the urge to sift through them. Then he shuffled them again. Then he adjusted his already written cards—they were in danger of falling over— and he adjusted his seat. His mother called him for dinner, and without thinking, he responded he would be down in a moment. Just a moment, it wouldn’t take too long. Eddy wasn’t hard to gift, it wouldn’t be hard to choose a card. Eddy would _accept_ the card. He just wasn’t.... one to appreciate the gesture. Well, he hoped that underneath his friend’s macho guise, he’d secretly appreciate it. The worst he could do, Edd reasoned, was tease him about it. He’d just have to prepare himself for the predictable, inevitable response. 

Was he so tired that he was overthinking things now? He chided himself that it was merely a card for Eddy. A simple card. 

Edd eyed the brightest card out of the bunch— its neon purple background and white bolts of poorly photoshopped lighting stuck out like a sore thumb. 

**“You Electrify Me!”**

  
He wondered, just for a moment, if he should even bother giving it to Eddy. Sitting up straight and crossing his shoulders, he slightly leaned forward onto the desk, looming over the card. He let out a pensive hum, examining its contents as if it held an answer. 

Edd quickly realized how silly he looked, interrogating Nikola Tesla the way he was. He scratched the top of his head and let out a small laugh. Honestly, he expected himself to be this nervous picking a card out for Nazz, not for his friend.

  
He picked up his pen for the umpteenth time.

_click click. scritch scritch_

The card was bright and loud, that much was true. That was all that it needed to be, in all honesty. The message didn’t have to mean anything. He drew dotted lines between the to/from columns, realizing he needed more room.

**To: Eddy.**

All this trouble for store-bought gestures. He rolled his eyes playfully. Could his mind ever shut up? He fondly recalled Eddy once joking that underneath his hat sat intricate, infinitely winding gears where his brain should be, rendering him a literal motor mouth. Or once, to his chagrin, that he hid antennae. Or another time, that it was his secret conjoined twin. Edd wondered why Eddy was so fixated with his hat. What perplexed him, even more, was how Eddy continued to entertain the wildest secrets he hid underneath, even when he already knew what it was. Each crazier fantasy garnered louder laughs from Double Dee and Ed. Really, compared to Eddy’s wild imagination, it made what was truly underneath so insignificant. It…made him feel a lot better about it.

His hand paused, the pen resting on an almost finished “F”. He skirted his eyes around in thought. Would Eddy do that on purpose? Searching his memory, he recalled Eddy looking to him, his expression smug and proud of his hat jokes. Nothing unusual there. Yet the more he thought about it, the more it seemed Eddy pulled out his pocket quips and jokes when Edd felt particularly cross or stressed.

Not too long ago—oh, a week ago, perhaps? —Eddy found him sitting on the edge of the bleachers, a place where Double Dee always retreated to study. While reading for his upcoming Geometry test, he picked at the edge of his hat, tucking and untucking strands of hair. He remembered his shoulders and wrist growing tenser as he hunched into his book, but he had opted to ignore it in favor of focusing on the text. A usual habit, one that Double Dee paid no mind to. And for the life of him, he didn’t know why, Eddy firmly pulled his hands away from his cap instead of saying hello. He hadn’t even noticed Eddy’s presence, let alone him trying to call his name for minutes on end. Eddy had said something to him, but they were muffled as Edd struggled to process the shock of his friend’s arrival. He had lamely asked “huh?”, to which Eddy refused to respond. Instead, Eddy had sighed and shook his head in… concern and annoyance. Ed then arrived just behind him, and as soon as he came into their peripheral, Eddy lit up and began making another tall tale about the secret under his hat. Again, Eddy’s words fell deaf to Edd’s ears, but he remembered being acutely aware of the fact that the entire time Eddy kept their hands clasped. From the way he wildly swung them in the air and gestured about, Eddy was too caught up in his tale to even notice. Edd certainly did though—he was speechless at the touch of his friend’s warm and soft hands. He didn’t have any other way to describe it, other than ‘electrifying’. 

  
**From: Edd. (Double Dee).**

Eddy wasn’t one to be openly appreciative. Edd wouldn’t expect anything less than Eddy’s verbal retaliation from something as simple as a Valentine card. 

He blew on the ink. Once dried, he placed the card down. Edd didn’t bother to straighten it out, finding himself perfectly fine with its crooked position on the stack.

His mother called him once more, and Edd promptly stood up to exit the door. His mother was _not_ one to call him a third time.

Before stepping out into the hallway, he gazed back at the stack one more time. The sheen of plastic cardstock was caught in the lamp’s light, reverberating a mix of purples and yellows around the minty hues of his walls. He found it quite lovely.

Maybe Eddy would appreciate the card in his own unpredictable way, even if he wouldn’t say it. Double Dee smiled to himself. Yes, from Eddy, he wouldn’t expect anything less.


End file.
